My body is beautiful, let me love her

I am having a hard time sitting still.
Uncomfortable in my burgeoning body.
My pregnant belly grows larger by the day.
I wish it would pause,
and give me time to catch my breath.

Everyone has something to say.
Most of it hurts.
They whisper and point.
I feel them,
from every angle.

My brick walls are coming apart,
tearing loose
years of insecurities built up.
I feel raw,
unhealed from before.

I want to love this new body.
From the stretching skin to the dark line
now connecting my womb to my belly button.
I want to love her.
She’s growing a life inside of her.
A baby girl, no less.

But you pull and pull.
and tear and tear.
Commenting on my size every time.
Too big for only 16 weeks.
Too pregnant.
Are you eating too much?
Eat less.
Walk more.
Wow,
you’re going to look like a house by the end.

Can’t they see?
The pain behind my eyes?

I am struggling…
to love
this new body.
A body, I haven’t loved before.

Please let me.

My body is beautiful.
She is strong
and powerful.
She is giving life to something wonderful.

Please, I beg you.
Let me love her silently and in peace.

to be continued…